I was sitting on the couch, a little dazed from trying to recall everything I wanted to share during our call, when she remarked at how much I had going on. It was true, I had a lot going on, but all the moving pieces were being handled as best I could. I wondered why I wasn’t as alarmed or impressed as she was by what I had shared and I came up with this…
There will always be stuff.
Crossing the country and starting over had me imagining my new life in different ways. From starting my own Taekwon-Do school, to running holistic retreats, to training others how to work with children in a martial arts context.
None of that looks like what’s happening now. (Except for the retreat – check out Full Moon Whole Body events.) Sometimes I even question what I’m doing. Did I make the right choice? I’m wearing so many hats… proprietor, property manager, hostess, housekeeper, etc. So much is swirling around me, legal issues, real estate deals, and at the same time I’m learning to work with people with ADHD and other special needs. The thing is, even if I was doing something different, or had followed a more familiar path, there would still be unplanned and unexpected things to contend with.
Life is the way life is.
My friend shared with me what she’s dealing with too. She’s in graduate school and a TA. She’s taking care of her ailing mother, navigating life as a newlywed, and expecting her first child. Things are a bit chaotic, unorganized. She told me about how she knew and wished she was more on top of things, but what I heard in her sharing was peacefulness and calm. She was alright with how things were because she knows herself, as I do. Like me, she procrastinates and waits till the last minute. But she knows it will get done, and done well. So whether or not things are organized as they “should” be, she knows that they will happen. Even though it doesn’t look like what either of us think being “on top of it” looks like. I say, she is on top of things, in her own way.
Acceptance was her path to peace and it can be yours too. Do not let yourself fall for the “Should’s”. Accepting what is, is the best way to bring yourself peace and happiness. Suffering is simply believing that something should be some way other than the way it is. If you can just be with what’s so, and not make it wrong, there is peace to be had.
As I said to my tenant the other week, when he was stressed about getting things ready for an event “Things will get done… or they won’t and if they don’t, they probably weren’t that important anyway.”
What do you think?